1.Stop comparing yourself to others. Moms especially have a tendency to do this. It is crazy making and unnecessary. Compare yourself to yesterday. Did you do better today? Good. That’s all that matters. Compare where you are at to where YOU want to be. Keep your eyes on the prize. Your prize. Not anyone else’s. And while we are at it, don’t judge. Your neighbor may choose different things that equate to perfection for her. Let her pursue her own expectations while you pursue yours. No one loves your kids as much as you do. You do you. Let others be. Unless someone is being blatantly harmful or neglectful, just respect that they are doing the best they can and let’s all try to get along.
2.Stop buying things you don’t truly love or need. How often do you go to the mall and grab a few extra things cuz they’re on sale? Do you fill your shelves with unnecessary knick knacks? Are your closets lined with clothes that still have price tags or drawers of cheap purses that you never use? Do you buy your kids crap at the dollar store because, well, it’s only a dollar? And then a few months go by and you realize said items have not been touched? It is all contributing to clutter in your home which leads to a cluttered and anxious mind. In 2017, commit to buy less but choose well. A well made pricier item that gets used all the time is always a better choice than the cheap items which collect dust in a pile. Teach your family to make do with less. Let your kids learn how to use their imaginations and to appreciate what they have, and don’t buy gifts for other people if you’re not sure that they will be used.
3.Stop using the word “perfect” like it’s a 4 letter word. “Nobody’s perfect. There is no such thing as Pinterest perfect. I’m not a perfect mother”. I’m so tired of this word being used like wanting to attain perfection is a bad thing. Actually, Pinterest perfect DOES exist. I built a whole nursery for my twins based on ideas from Pinterest and I’ve been in love with my kids’ room for 4 years and get many compliments on it. It’s also important to me to have a perfectly tidy living space 90% of the time and I also like to look put together when it comes to my style and my makeup. Not because someone else says I should. But because these things make ME happy. It is all important to me so I made it that way. It’s ok to strive for perfection, that is how people succeed in life. And perfection is subjective. Focus on what’s important to you, and figure out a way to make that happen, and your life CAN be perfect. Perfect for you.
4.Stop taking things personally. There are so many times in my life I have apparently said or done something to offend someone. Guess what? It wasn’t my intent and if something I said bothered you it’s probably because you have an underlying issue that I know nothing about and I unknowingly hit a nerve. Vice versa, the same has happened to me. There have been many times I have lost sleep over someone saying something that devastated me. And then one day I read THIS book and I woke up and realized no one is in charge of my happiness except me. When someone does or says something that bothers you, ask yourself “why does this bother me so much?”- it has completely changed my outlook. Not to mention I’m much happier and spend (almost) zero time ruminating over something someone said to me. I can’t control how others feel nor can I control what they say and do. I can only control myself. Stop trying to hold other people responsible for your feelings. Teach your kids this as well. It’s wonderfully enlightening.
5.Stop hiding behind your computer. If you’re not sure about something, ask. Don’t make assumptions, especially not based on something you gathered from today’s social media feed. Call people instead of texting them. Next time Facebook reminds you of someone’s birthday, or you see someone post something that concerns you, if they’re truly important to you, contact them directly instead of posting a generic message on their wall. In the age of social media and technology, we have stopped talking to each other. We don’t know how to communicate anymore. If you have an issue with someone- CALL them. Social media is not a vessel for a real relationship so don’t treat it like one. Yes it is great for business and networking and keeping in touch but it’s not the same as actually talking to someone. Interact with people directly and teach your kids to do the same. We all crave human interaction but we have forgotten how to truly interact with humans. It’s very sad and disheartening. Let’s be the generation that changes the direction our society is moving when it comes to this.
Now, check out THIS article to see what you should START doing instead.